The Love Letter Project: It Starts with Us

I am a sentimental teacher. I believe that elementary teachers do a wonderful job with their kids by making mementos for moms and dads to hold onto for years and years, and that's so precious. I can't wait for that kind of thing as my kids get older. However, in the high-school world, this idea sort of dissolves into ACT scores, resumes, scholarship applications, and extracurricular practices. Kids get too busy, the parents get overwhelmed with life, and the teachers are expected to teach everything the students will need to survive in this crazy world. High school is a dog-eat-dog world. We as teachers in general witness our students go through all kinds of things. Some kids have moved in and out with different people their whole lives. I see different kids who have never had anyone to care about them. I see kids who feel pressured to be perfect because everyone expects it out of them. I see a lot. I see a lot of things I wish I never had to see. I see a lot of stuff I didn't see when I was in high school myself.

The truth is, we had no clue about each other. If I could go back for just one day, I would know. It's 2017, but our worlds were probably so very similar. Some of the kids in our school probably had an entirely different childhood experience that we never knew anything about. There were probably kids who didn't know where their parents were, kids who went without meals, kids who got yelled at all night, kids who came home to no one, kids who felt unloved, and we had no idea. We had no idea on earth what each other was going through.

God laid it upon my heart to do my best to change that for my tenth graders. I've taught these kids for two years. I've been a part of their lives from age 14-16, and I think you all can agree with me that these two years are two of the most crucial years for a teenager. They make a lot of choices within these two years, and most of those choices are based on what other people want or expect. Instilling within these kids some confidence is what I strive to do every day, so a lot of my lessons are centered around choices and self-discovery. It's now or never. Some of their choices will affect them for the rest of their lives. Some decisions lead to other bad decisions, and it spirals out of control, often times leaving kids feeling so alone and isolated, so out of touch with any sort of redemption, that they give up entirely. Some kids feel so ridiculously different, like they'll never measure up, that they don't see an end to the race. For some kids, they don't see a finish line. For some kids, they don't see an end.

Love begins with us. We can talk about bullying, suicide, and drug use all day long, but until our kids feel loved and secure, until they feel valued and respected, until they have an inkling as to what their neighbor is going through, they will never feel confident enough to stand up for themselves and make good decisions. How do you make a kid who has never been respected or loved sit still in your class, complete his assignments, treat others with respect, all while smiling as he works? It's just about impossible, but it starts with us. There are some days when I want to give up with some kids and lose my cool. There are days where I question what God called me to do. Hey, don't we all? How I react--in love or in hate--might make or break the situation, though. It might change it all. I believe God can work through us like that, do you?

I call it the Love Letter Project.

All kids were to go home and type out a message in black ink, 12 point, Times New Roman font. They were to write around a half of a page on their dreams, insecurities, fears, doubts, anxieties, and regrets. They were to add only what they felt comfortable including, and they were not to add anything that would share who they were. It was to be completely anonymous. I explained to them prior that the kids would discreetly place them in a pile, and I would mix them up just to prove no one would know who they were. I numbered each letter, and I began passing them out. Each student had a tally sheet with the number of letters I had, and as they read a letter, they would mark it off their sheet so they would know whose they hadn't read. Each time they read a letter, they would write a message to leave with that student. After two days, I put all the letters in order on the table, and as they left class, they grabbed their letters (because they eventually figured out the letter that was theirs) and were able to read the comments.

When we completed this assignment, I marveled at my kids. I truly felt like they grew three inches and began floating off the ground. I could see it in their eyes that they were witnessing something special, and I was so proud of them. They loved it, and I can't help but think of all the kids it touched in my classes. After it was over, and I asked them what they thought about it, their eyes lit up. They said things like...

• "I never knew other kids were going through the same things as I was."
• "I just can't believe what some kids in this room are facing each day." 
• "Everyone just puts on a happy face, but we're all in the same boat together."

We can teach grammar, poetry, and literature all day long, but until these kids feel valuable, they will look for validation in all the wrong places. I'm sure that if you look deeply enough, you know this to be true somewhat in your own life. We can all relate!

It truly starts with love and realizing that you never know what someone is going through. Teaching love is crucial to combat this sinful world. If I teach my kiddos anything, I hope it's how to love and respect each other.

I hope this brightened up your news feeds today. Teenagers get a bad rap, but there is good in them.

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The Love Letter Project: It Starts with Us